Mel K. “The Better Kendziorski”
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Record: 15-10-2
Scramble 7-5-2 Best Ball 1-3-0 1 v 1 7-2-0 |
Yearly Summary
2013: After what sounded like a pretty disappointing performance Friday, Mel stepped up, won a long drive (no idea how), and was able to win in the 2 man best ball and defeat Jason in the 1 v 1 matchup despite being launched out of a golf cart. Impressive!
2014: Mel managed to win 2 out 3 matches which is all a captain can ask for. Luckily his Alzheimer's didn't affect him too much. Apparently the secret to living to 100 years old is sipping Southern
Comfort out of a wine glass.
2015: After what sounds like one of the most miserable two man scramble matches of all time that ended in a tie with Troy and Dan-o, Mel got his butt whooped all day Saturday. The debut of his new driver Lady Antebellum did not do the trick which is surprising since most women's drivers from local garage sales usually work out well.
2016: Luke wasn’t the only Kendziorski that struggled throughout the weekend. Mel started off 0-2 on the weekend before having a head to head seniors’ match with Ken. It was back and forth all day and everyone thought Ken had squeaked out a tie after Mel lipped out a putt on the 18th green. However, miraculously somehow the putt spun backwards after the lip out and into the hole to secure Mel is only point for the weekend.
2017: What a year for Mel….after celebrating his 109th birthday he was off to the Ryder Cup. He got to team up with his idiot son Luke Friday afternoon and coasted to a 5&4 victory. Then in a very tight match with Eric and Kyle, Mel found enough balls to win 1UP. He then dismantled Ken to an 8&6 victory that earned him MVP of 2017. We of course had to wake him up to notify him of it.
2018: The reigning MVP teamed up with C-Lo and destroyed Team Barnak on Friday afternoon 5&4. Then he was teamed up with Casey and was able to outduel Kyle and Ty to a 2&1 victory. He would face off with Jason in the 1 on 1 match. Jason was very confident in his skills. Jason was the ONLY person confident in his skills. Mel beat him senseless with a 7&5 victory to go 3-0 for a second straight year.
2019: After back to back 3-0 years for Mel, expectations were high. Those expectations were quickly squashed as soon as Mel teed off on the first hole. He started the weekend by dragging Brad down into his miserable play and losing 1DN. He followed that up with nearly getting into a fist fight with partner Steve on Saturday morning, handing inept Captain Nathan a rare victory on a silver platter. Going into the 1 on 1 round he was challenging Brandon for the LVP honors but luckily got to square off against a pathetic Dano. The old cheating Mel came out in that round with an easy 6&5 victory bringing Dano’s 1 on 1 record to an IMPRESSIVE 0-7-0.
2021: Mel had an impressive 2021 Ryder Cup from the yellow tees. He was able to trade in the old lady driver for a men's driver and be within a pitching wedge on every hole. The opening 18 was a battle with his son against the newly minted Lombardo pairing of Jason and Staten. Mel and Luke got up early but the Lombardo pairing were able to fight back to keep the match All Square. Saturday morning, Mel partnered with Poet against Staten again, however this time Jeff wasn't quite the partner Jason was. Mel and Poet were too much for the Lombardo pair to handle, and were able to confidently win 4&2. Fun fact: Mel has a distinct smell that attracted a male turkey to follow him for 3 holes. Mel then was matched against The Boss and was able to man handle the poor guy, beating him on the 11th hole and never looking back. 2022 will be a different year for Mel as he will be forced to once again use the white tees and will be matched against a much more formidable opponent in Nick.
2022: If you choose to not show up the following year, you don't get a recap!
2014: Mel managed to win 2 out 3 matches which is all a captain can ask for. Luckily his Alzheimer's didn't affect him too much. Apparently the secret to living to 100 years old is sipping Southern
Comfort out of a wine glass.
2015: After what sounds like one of the most miserable two man scramble matches of all time that ended in a tie with Troy and Dan-o, Mel got his butt whooped all day Saturday. The debut of his new driver Lady Antebellum did not do the trick which is surprising since most women's drivers from local garage sales usually work out well.
2016: Luke wasn’t the only Kendziorski that struggled throughout the weekend. Mel started off 0-2 on the weekend before having a head to head seniors’ match with Ken. It was back and forth all day and everyone thought Ken had squeaked out a tie after Mel lipped out a putt on the 18th green. However, miraculously somehow the putt spun backwards after the lip out and into the hole to secure Mel is only point for the weekend.
2017: What a year for Mel….after celebrating his 109th birthday he was off to the Ryder Cup. He got to team up with his idiot son Luke Friday afternoon and coasted to a 5&4 victory. Then in a very tight match with Eric and Kyle, Mel found enough balls to win 1UP. He then dismantled Ken to an 8&6 victory that earned him MVP of 2017. We of course had to wake him up to notify him of it.
2018: The reigning MVP teamed up with C-Lo and destroyed Team Barnak on Friday afternoon 5&4. Then he was teamed up with Casey and was able to outduel Kyle and Ty to a 2&1 victory. He would face off with Jason in the 1 on 1 match. Jason was very confident in his skills. Jason was the ONLY person confident in his skills. Mel beat him senseless with a 7&5 victory to go 3-0 for a second straight year.
2019: After back to back 3-0 years for Mel, expectations were high. Those expectations were quickly squashed as soon as Mel teed off on the first hole. He started the weekend by dragging Brad down into his miserable play and losing 1DN. He followed that up with nearly getting into a fist fight with partner Steve on Saturday morning, handing inept Captain Nathan a rare victory on a silver platter. Going into the 1 on 1 round he was challenging Brandon for the LVP honors but luckily got to square off against a pathetic Dano. The old cheating Mel came out in that round with an easy 6&5 victory bringing Dano’s 1 on 1 record to an IMPRESSIVE 0-7-0.
2021: Mel had an impressive 2021 Ryder Cup from the yellow tees. He was able to trade in the old lady driver for a men's driver and be within a pitching wedge on every hole. The opening 18 was a battle with his son against the newly minted Lombardo pairing of Jason and Staten. Mel and Luke got up early but the Lombardo pairing were able to fight back to keep the match All Square. Saturday morning, Mel partnered with Poet against Staten again, however this time Jeff wasn't quite the partner Jason was. Mel and Poet were too much for the Lombardo pair to handle, and were able to confidently win 4&2. Fun fact: Mel has a distinct smell that attracted a male turkey to follow him for 3 holes. Mel then was matched against The Boss and was able to man handle the poor guy, beating him on the 11th hole and never looking back. 2022 will be a different year for Mel as he will be forced to once again use the white tees and will be matched against a much more formidable opponent in Nick.
2022: If you choose to not show up the following year, you don't get a recap!
Player Bio
Mel first started to golf in the year 1893, when he was 16 years old. He still uses the same set of clubs he did back then. If you are on the course and you hear a golf ball hitting wood, it could either be someone hitting a tree, or Mel hitting his 3 wood, or 5 wood, or 7 wood , or 9 wood. If you see Natural Light cans on the course you know Mel has been there. You'll see him in the evenings sipping Southern Comfort out of a wine glass or scouring local garage sales for new clubs.
Ryder Cup Highlight
Mel's Ryder Cup Highlight came in the 2013 1 v 1 matchup. While battling against Jason on the horrendous BugShire course, Mel decided to ride with Jason in the same cart so Jason had no way of getting away from the endless trash talking. However this backfired as Jason, in a desperate move, made a quick hard left sending Mel flying out of the golf cart and tumbling down the fairway.
Fun Fact
Mel was actually alive during the Prohibition Era which explains his love for high end alcohol (Natural Ice and Southern Comfort).